Showing posts with label The Legend That Is Keeton Alford. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Legend That Is Keeton Alford. Show all posts

Friday, April 11, 2014

Session 165 - Mr Tapey *CLASSIC SPECIAL*


M25, PARK, RECHARGEABLE POD, CUCUMBER IN TIN FOIL, BEER!

During this session of the world's barometer for constructive swearing talk turns to the hard hitting topics of Lowestoft, the difference between a Pale Ale and an IPA, meeting Mr Tapey, C.J's first selfie and Daz has exciting news!

In-flight Audiogasms® are available mid podcast and will be served up by the super sexy stewardesses Son Of Robot and the most forgiving cabin crew to ever grace first class! The Wave Pictures!

As ever, It's here! It's beer! It's a pound per pint! Not a pint per pound!

Cheers!

Friday, February 14, 2014

Session 161 - Leerdammers


BIT OF LEERDAMMER? TAKE A SHOT!

During this session, oh yeah happy Valentines Day... whatever...
During this session of the best free English language course on the fucking internet, talk turns to Dr Who-fucking-gives-a-shite?, The Icelandic brewery making a splash with whale beer, The American woman / hero that will want to change her name because of listening to our show and wants you to drink more... surprisingly not because of listening to our show!

This weeks Audiogasms® are rubbed into your listening parts by the ever fantastical and brilliant The Wave Pictures! Additional jaw droppingly delicious noises from our favourite friends from Atlanta (Except Keeton!) The always in time and full of fun The Wild!
We love their new video:



YEAH!
As ever it's here! It's beer! If you like it then you better put some cheese on it?


Cheese!

Friday, January 10, 2014

Session 160 - Multimedia *SPECIAL*



LIKE SHOES FALLING OUT OF A LOFT!

During this session, oh yeah happy new year and all that...
During this session of what your booze thinks about you in .mp3 format, talk turns to fantastic TV like Breaking Bad, fantastic films like Beverly Hills Cop III, fantastic podcasts like this, that, the other and the other other, great music like from our buddies and bands that we play on our show but also from other wonderful people like this guy, this guy and definitely these guys!
Also Daz can't mime and C.J thinks it's still November 2013! THE MADNESS!!!

This weeks fantastical Audiogasms® are piped into your brain lugs by the delicious persons known as The Wild, the sexy boys called Son Of Robot and the venerable and 100% brilliant chaps called The Wave Pictures!


As ever it's here! It's beer! Which one is he?



Cheers!

Friday, May 24, 2013

Session 145 - Brewdogland

LET'S FACE THE MASTIC AND DANCE!

During this session of the finest hands on audio only builders guide on the internet, talk turns to Silly builders, The silly French, The silly North Korean government, The silly Chinese newspaper cock offices, Silly Saddam Hussein, silly golf ball finders / bomb detectors, Silly UN, Silly UK mains plugs, silly vanilla Coke and the silly bloke with his box of silly wooden penises... Peni?

Hixontastic® Audiogasmsmic® tunes are flopped in your ear pipes by the best dressed trio in that recording studio on that particular day. The one, the only The Hixon Trial! With additional Audio-Goat-Heads® prescribed by Dr Hixon along with a course of a free .mp3 download of the song featured on this show! Right click >>HERE<< and click "Save Link As" to download and keep for all of your summoning Moira emergencies.

As ever, It's here! It's beer! Take your goat head and call us in a matter of days!


Cheers!

Friday, February 01, 2013

Session 137 - Going-Dow(n) Jones *SPECIAL*



BOIL THEM, BLEACH THEM AND THEN BURN THEM! JUST IN CASE!

During this session of the best free financial / booby advice service in the world, Bromley Daz fixes visual dependency by making an inaudible visual reference on mic, C.J Hixon fixes everyone's tax woes by expanding on an obvious role for one of society's more unemployable souls and the legend that is Keeton Alford makes a world improving suggestion!
Good work lad!

Audiogasms® are provided courtasy of economic guru Sir John Smith and those filthy "5p per item of clothing" sultry strippers Son Of Robot!

As ever, It's here! It's beer! Your ears may be at risk if you do not keep up downloads of this Podcast, Podcasts are subject to availability, Everybody except Danny Dyer is a winner, Terms and conditions apply!

Cheers!

Friday, January 18, 2013

Session 136 - Mr Tapey

M25, PARK, RECHARGEABLE POD, CUCUMBER IN TIN FOIL, BEER!

During this session of the world's barometer for constructive swearing talk turns to the hard hitting topics of Lowestoft, the difference between a Pale Ale and an IPA, meeting Mr Tapey and exciting Daz news!

In-flight Audiogasms® are available mid podcast and will be served up by the super sexy stewardesses Son Of Robot and the most forgiving cabin crew to ever grace first class! The Wave Pictures!

As ever, It's here! It's beer! It's a pound per pint! Not a pint per pound!

Cheers!

Friday, July 27, 2012

Session 123 - Owdi

READY! SET! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOU!

During this session of the internet's only saving grace, talk turns to Quentin Tarentino's stunning appearance in the Bible, Viki from Leatherhead's views on crotchless panties and the Economy (They're both the same in that the bottom has dropped out of them right?! - C.J), How one billionaire's Matrix is a poor man's terrible podcast, C.J says one nice thing about Lee Howard, and Daz likes a beer... sort of.

Audiogasms® are oiled up and rubbed down by the man that makes Gentleman's Relish look like a paupers paste. The classiest man that we've ever met with the name Mr John Smith!
Additional Audiogash® is proudly presented right at your ear pipes by the super sexy sound sensation known as Son Of Robot!

As ever, It's here! It's beer! OWLS!

Friday, July 13, 2012

Session 122 - AIBV


RIDICULOUS TOPLESS (bus) BEER TOURS!

During this weeks session of the best man made audio drinking guide ever, topics turn to the impending rise of the machines including, Robo-Farts, Robo-Beer, Robo-Rock, Robo-Paper, Robo-Scissors, Robo-Disco-Bhangra and a 100% humanoid operated drinking establishment that happens to be the best ruddy pub in the world! Fact!

In more important news, our boy Keeton Alford turned 21! Mazel tov for beer in Georgia buddy! Georgia?!? You, dear boy, can now quote promo code: "C.J & Daz sent me!" at the bar for a slight discount and a confused look from your local smooth talking Bar Steward... Just don't order a paltry Heineken... go for a nice Desperados, Super Bock or Guinness for the win! Good lad! We love you!

Audiogasms® are schmeared all over your sexy ear parts by a man that takes one look at your dirty little lug holes and thinks:
"I can fit something delicious right in there!"

Of course, it's the one and only LuKuS! Additional Audiogastasticness® is funnelled into your head like a cool and sexy salve by the ever missed, super self aware Son Of Robot! It's automated awesomeness!


As ever, It's here! It's Beer! SHIT!
THEY'RE TAKING OVER!


Friday, May 18, 2012

Session 118 - Quipstarter

BARRY GIBBONS FROM WARWICKSHIRE! THIS POOP IS FOR YOU!

During this (Slightly less charmingly inebriated than the last) session of the world's bestest ever audio drinking guide, there's talk about the fact that Daz actually read the news, sexy subservient chickens, why Regular Dave's car owes C.J a quid, why Amanda Fucking Palmer has inspired some lucrative yet arty public filth, the future pub in the sky and getting anal...
Sort your fucking CDs out!

Audiogasms® are rubbed all over your listening parts this week by the very sexy, very messy boys known as Son Of Robot!
Additional Audiogastastic® ear hole massage provided by the one and only LuKuS!


As ever, It's here! It's beer! Come fly with us come fly let's fly away!
If you could use some exotic booze there's some beer in the luggage bay!


Cheers!

Friday, April 20, 2012

Session 116 - Bacon Mayer


Bacon! BACON! Oh Jesus Christ, BAAAACON!

During this session of the world's only audio cure for sobriety talk turns to slices of love Bacon, Filthy filthy love burgers, ad hoc shut-your-trap-and-order-your-fucking-drink-non-love-signage, Peta's Pie based love billboard, Why we love getting older and why we love hating your shitty fucking music...

Jessie J. Chico. Westlife. Etc.

We also ponder on why we derive so much pleasure from good musicians. The kind of people that selflessly offer Audiogasms® like the ones supplied this week by one John that doesn't need to change his name, the one and only John Smith!
Additional Audiogastastic® tunes are supplied by the most forgiving men in the universe, The Wave Pictures!

As ever, It's here! It's beer! Bacon.

Cheers!

Friday, April 06, 2012

Session 115 - Fowl

COMING FROM THE MOUTHS OF CELEBRITIES!

On this weeks session of the modern, more drunk, audio only version of Bullseye (with better prizes) talk turns to Aliens, Waiters, Doctors, Town Councillors, Actresses, Ballers, Scientologists, London Underground Ticket Holders, Bears, Tramps, Welshmen, Englishmen, Americans, Canadians, Jokers, Smokers, Midnight Tokers, Entrepreneurs, Belles, Sebastians, Hookers, Printers, Glam Rockers, Massive Cloppers and why Kat from EastEnders, that bloke that tarmaced your driveway for £40, the tanned ghost of Vegas past and Omar from The Wire's gay younger brother have their own music show when really they should be pushed into a pit and forced to fight eachother to the death.

The usual.

Audiogasms® are seductively massaged into your ear drums this week by the sweetest group of guys and gal to ever emerge from Georgia? We've never met... them?
The super duper, the super awesome The Wild!
Additional Audiogastasticness!® supplied by our ever missed, bestest ever house band Son Of Robot (R.I.P)

As ever! It's here! It's Beer! It's not even close to resembling the shittest ever episode of Mastermind!

Cheers!

Friday, March 23, 2012

Session 114 - Noteworthy?


ACIIIIIIID!

During this latest session of the world's most notable drinky drunken Internet swear machine talk turns to such topics as, how to spel good lyke wot we do, a silly girl with a phobia of the hangover curing elixir known as
Guinness, why Brett Wales is more notable than Jimmy Wales, how alcohol is obviously a drink and not a drug,

...and a Dick Cheney being a Dick Cheney.

Audiogasms® are slung into your ear pipes this week by one man called LuKuS and another man called B-Sydes! Oooh! it's Audiogastastic!®

As ever, It's here! It's beer! We're Jimmy Wales... on acid!

Cheers!

Friday, February 10, 2012

Session 111 - Twattage!


TO ME! TO YOU! TO ME! TO YOU!
On this latest installment of the Great British drinking experiment sore backs and tiredness take a back seat to such topics as who is never making an appearence on the show... ever, Indonesia's big swinging balls, why high priced Hollywood investements are best paid in cash and vans... moving boxes... in vans.

Audiogasms® come right in your ears in the form of LuKuS with a side chaser of the only band that can say adios to a beloved recording space, the truly awesome Son Of Robot!


As ever, It's here! It's beer! We love studio D, bye!



Cheers!

Friday, October 07, 2011

Session 102 - Chris-mas (Part 1) *SPECIAL*



*Warning! During this session of Liquid Inspiration Podcast
the words "Fiat" and "Multipla" are used next to each other in sequence.*


WOLVER WHAT NOW?!
It's finally here! The special you have all been waiting for!
Well, as the title suggests it's actually the specials you have all been waiting for as when the finest podcast money can't buy travels across the country in search of super awesome guest hosts, it doesn't do things by halves.
No! It does things by doubles!

Part one of this classic toofah starring the ever awesome Kylie Posnett and the ever charming Christopher D Bate contains talk of beauty spa treatments gone wrong, a decadent death by dumplings, cunning tips on getting free pizza, how a city can be quite like a "scrappy little bloke", bin pasty roulette, Ryan fucking Estes and many, many more family favourites...

Audiogasms® are supplied this week by those charming chaps, the boys from Brighton Son Of Robot! Additional Audiogasmicness® is supplied this week by the ever handsome and noisey LuKuS!

As ever, it's here! It's beer! It's in the midlands?!


Why not have some proof of Cribble's fantastic dress sense!

Friday, August 26, 2011

Session 99 - Context



BRRAAAIIINNNSSSS!!!!

This week on the home of drunken logic the chaps discuss the French, the mysterious Austrailian phenominon of reverse beer goggles, how to fix the country (again) and shit super heroes during all of which C.J allows a fancy Belgiums beer to give him fancy Belgiums burps.

Audiogasms® are supplied this week by the most forgiving, the handsome, the talented, the one, the only, The Wave Pictures with additional ear hole satisfaction is served up courtasy of our new friends The Wild!

As ever it's here! It's Beer! It's all about context.

Friday, May 06, 2011

Session 91 - Comebacker II


LOVE A DUCK! WE'RE BACK!
This week the saviours of internet drinky drunkenness have a* cold pint** discuss the ancient martial art of nans mugging chavs, why you should carefully choose your TV/Broadband service provider and fart.

Yes.

Fart.

Audiogasms® are supplied this week by the ever handsome and multi faceted LuKuS with additional Audiogasmic® soul soothing from those boys in the band from Brighton Son Of Robot!

GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!*** WITH VENTED SPLEEN!


...Also don't forget to send Mr Cribble cigarettes when he gets sent to The Tower after making the funniest thing we've seen in weeks!

Enjoy!






* Read as "lots"
** Read as "pints"
*** Read as "posh totty of all titles!"

Friday, April 22, 2011

Session 90 - Keyloff


THIS SHOW CONTAINS 0% CHERNOBYL TANNED, MULING SYCOPHANTS!

This week the saviours of internet radio pick apart the run of the mill, everyday topics of inbred royalty, time travel, Facebook, zombies and darts.

De-fucking-licious!

Audiogasms® are supplied this week by the only man to ever have a beard and be called B-Sydes, the one and only B-Sydes!
Additional Audiogasmic® Audiogasms® are supplied this week by the only man to ever have a beard and be called John Smith, the one and only John Smith!

As ever, It's here! It's beer! By Crom it's good!

Friday, February 25, 2011

Session 82 - Hari-Kari


At the next Podcast, Turn left... You left the gas on didn't you?
This week the saviours of drinky drunken swearyness discuss top notch celebrity endorsements, correct eating etiquette when taking in the arts, heavy duty, durable waste collection bags and C.J's brand new religion of fourteen or so years... aside from the obvious.

Audiogasms® this week are delivered by the ever rugged and manly John Smith! (Who would also like to remind you that you can still vote for him on his Tunebreaker.com profile and buy some 60p songs if you want... and seeing as we are putting words in his mouth he'd also like you to know that we here at L.I.P are his best friends in the whole wide world and that he's scared of spiders and wears frilly pants... probably)
Additional handsome men making brilliant audio style noises comes in the form of the most forgiving band in the universe! The Wave Pictures!

As ever, It's here! It's beer! Don't stick that in there!

Cheers!


Friday, February 04, 2011

Session 79 - Ambassaballs


WE ARE REALLY SPOILING YOU!
During this weeks session of drinky drunkyness the chaps discuss the best film ever made, how to achieve a really posh wank and the worst place to get a tattoo.

Audiogasms® are supplied this week by the only man to ever to have his songs played on liquid Inspiration Podcast AND be called John Smith at the same time! Plus additional Audiogasmic® extras from the one and only LuKuS!

Additional visual classiness is supplied by the ambassador's balls:



Cheers!

Friday, December 03, 2010

Session 70 - Steaming


BLAH!
This week the world's most qualified Internet drunkards push their distinguished and well beaten livers to the very brink by putting themselves on the outside of a record amount of beer before sitting down and recording the sweary weekly brilliance you have all come to love / hate and spank off listen to.

Given the the sheer heroic amount of alcohol ingested during this weeks session of sitting down and putting the world to rights, there is only one bunch of sexy Brighton boys that will cut the filthy drunken mustard.
Therefore it is only right to present you all with a veritable smörgåsbord of super saucy, sweet sounding sack of sonorousness; The one and only Son Of Robot!

Some people apologise for some of the things they've done. We like to say:

It's here! It's beer! We're shhho shhhorry...